Analog Coast

silicapathways posted a photo:

silicapathways posted a photo:

Used a layer made from my Kodak Brownie Hawkeye Flash to make this a fake ttv.

Jesus…having just finished my second draft of the day, and having spent the past…4 goddamn hours involved in Fantasy Football drafts, I can honestly say I’m pretty much done in terms of that…and luckily, I AM done in terms of that!

Anyway, The Northern Horde logged in to their draft 7 minutes prior to find…we pick NINTH? Ninth out of twelve teams? Uhhh…wow…did I have sex with the cyborg woman of the Yahoo randomizer or something? On the good side…it is a little nice being on an end of a serpentine draft, since I’ll always have picks 6 apart. On the bad side…it’s NINTH. It’s like…okay, you meet Steven Hawking. Now, you can be at the head end, where you get to talk to a complete genius. Or, you can be at the tail end, where you can observe the expansion of the genius’s colostomy bag. I feel like the Olympian who tripped over the first damn hurdle in the event. This sucks. One note, though…even though 3 of the positions are labelled as defensive linemen, in fact every true lineman AND every linebacker in the league has drawn that title, so ‘backers will be a big part of the league. This makes things a bit easier.

And we’re off! LT goes first…everyone jokes that they’re amazed, because everyone is tired/hungover/on their second draft of the day/obligated to join in by the FF gods themselves. #2 is…Tom Brady? Wow, someone expects 50 TD passes again, apparently. Perhaps someone also still believes in Santa, who may or may not bang hot chicks with Brady’s propensity. Let’s face it, the ladies like the dudes with the schwag, and Santa’s traveling with a load of gifts! #3…Addai? Seems a bit early. Moss and Manning go next…insane hopes that Brian Westbrook will freefall begin to germinate in my fevered brain. They are dashed when he goes 7th (Peterson went 6th). Marion Barber goes 8…holy fucking shit, Steven Jackson just fell to number 9 in the damn draft! This is like your grandma giving you a Ferrari at Christmas, instead of socks. I am amazed, and thrilled! (Just to round out the first round…Maurice Jones-Drew was a surprising 10th pick, Frank Gore went 11th, and Tony “Hey, Tom, I can score with hot chicks, too” Romo went 12th.

Now, I pick 3 down the list, and I have crazed dreams of landing another top flight running back. And, lo and behold, thanks to one of the people in front of me taking Michael Turner (Turner is big, and he’s fast. He’s also been LT’s backup his career so far, never having gotten more than maybe 100 carries in a season. He also plays for a team whose offense would be challenged by many Pop Warner teams. It’s like going out with a girl based on her hot voice…there’s a chance she’s a babe, but it’s also equally likely she’s 430 pounds…and a truck driver named Greg). Hello, Clinton Portis! This is a guy I thought I might be taking in round 1, and here I am landing him in round 2! This is shaping up incredibly well! The bad news…I gotta wait awhile before I pick next.

Brandon Jacobs (built like a tank, runs like a battering ram, gets hurt as often as a 90 year old man with glass bones) is a puzzling 2nd rounder, but the winner is autodraft, who supplies a rival with DeAngelo Williams in ROUND 2! Apparently, the Yahoo autodraft (and this guy, who didn’t change his player rankings) feel that a part time running back who will not be getting short yardage and goal line carries this year (and thus, won’t score as much) is one of the 24 best players in fantasy football. Wow.

For Round 3, I’m either taking a #1 receiver, or a #1 quarterback. I like TJ Houshmandzadeh (and not just for his awesome name) and Marques Colston (a damn good wideout, and also the 4th pick from the bottom in the REAL draft a few years back who has busted his ass and become a topnotch player) at wideout…and both go before I come up, Colston the pick before me. So, I ’settle’ for QB Ben Roethlisberger. Ben’s an enormous passer, threw for 4000 yards and 32 TDs last year, and can apparently survive taking a header off a motorbike and through a car windshield while not wearing a helmet, as he did 2 years ago. Gotta have an indestructible automaton heading up the team! WR Steve Smith goes with the next pick…he’s been suspended by his own team for the first 2 weeks for beating up a teammate in practice. And RB Laurence Maroney, who tormented me with his lack of production last year, is the last player in the round. I’m secretly pleased by this, as I think he MIGHT do better this year, and was thinking of taking him with my next pick. Now, I am no longer living by the whims of New England coach Bill Belichick, a man so dickishly awful that Mother Theresa would have kicked him square in the junk, then spit on him while he writhed on the ground. God’s reaction would have been a high five.

Round 4! I really need a receiver, but if one of the few top guys left (Anquan Boldin, Brandon Marshall) isn’t there, I can wait, and take something else. I would also seriously consider Reggie Bush, a running back who I hate in real life, but who has a lot of fantasy value in a league that rewards pass catching as heavily as this one does. Well, no Bush…yet again, a player I like goes the pick before my turn. However, BOTH receivers are there, as the only one to go before me is Torry Holt, a man who seems to be getting caught slowly by Father Time, and who is coming off an injury riddled season. Marshall was a flat out STUD for me last year…he was my sleeper who went on to catch 102 passes. Trouble is, he’s suspended for the first week, and I want a guy who can (hopefully) give me a full year’s production, so I take Boldin. Some puzzling picks to finish Round 4. Bobby Engram is also a good WR who had a great year for me last season, but he’s out the first 4 games AT LEAST recovering from surgery. Eli Manning goes WAY too early at QB…he led his team to a Super Bowl last year, but he throws a lot of picks, and his receiving corps ain’t exactly loaded with all pros. Willie Parker is a good back in real life, but his lack of touchdowns, especially this year, with the Steelers drafting a power runner to take goal line carries in round 1, kills him as a fantasy back. Trust me, I remember…and while I like Chicago’s Matt Forte (a rookie running back), he is playing on one of the worst offenses I have seen in years, which MIGHT just hurt his production.

Round 5…look who’s still there! 4 other wideouts have been drafted, but I still have Marshall sitting on the board, and can’t pass on him another round. He’s mine. No mindblowingly stupid choices this round…San Diego tight end Antonio Gates goes at the end…another terrific talent, but a guy who’s had so many foot problems that nobody knows if/when he even steps on the field this year. A gamble to be sure.

6th round…what…Jeremy Shockey is the 3rd tight end drafted? Not Kellen Winslow? That’s like having the choice to have sex with any woman you want, and deciding “You know, there’s just something about that Roseanne…” Wow, suddenly Winslow is VERY tempting. But, considering how quickly running backs are flying off the shelves in a 12 team draft, I want depth there, so Jonathan Stewart (the Carolina rookie who should be poaching carries AND touchdowns from the aforementioned DeAngelo Williams, and who has just been named the starter) it is. Probably a good call, since the 3rd rookie runner, Detroit’s Kevin Smith, goes 2 picks later, and I think Stewart’s the stronger choice. Denver’s Selvin Young going in Round 6 shows how thin the RB position really is…he isn’t bad, but his coach is a jackass who likes to mix and match running backs game to game and play to play on a whim.

7th round, and I need a good third receiver or a quality tight end, especially with Marshall out Week One. And…what the…did I just see DEVIN HESTER go? Good grief! Apparently a fellow GM decided to wake up this morning with a nice speedball of coke (part of a complete breakfast, if you’re a Colombian sleazebucket). Hester is a record setting kick returner. He is also such a bad receiver, that the Fly route confused him last year (the fly route’s easy. Run downfield. That’s it). Yet he is a STARTER for the Chicago Bears (perhaps giving you an idea just how awful that offense truly looks). Anyway, WOW. Unfortunately, 2 other guys I actually liked go before I pick, so I take Washington’s Santana Moss. He had a decent year last season, and I think the team’s new spread offense fits him to a tee. Not disappointed at all with this pick. Oddly, the first kicker goes with the next pick…jumping the gun JUST A TAD, which is sort of like saying that last year’s proclamations that Hilary Clinton would win the Democratic nomination in a walk MIGHT have been a bit premature. Also puzzling is the choice of Javon Walker. This is a man who has demanded a trade from 2 teams in 3 years. He also has a knee that’s bone on bone. He then signed one of the most ludicrously outsized contracts ever (Aaaah, the Oakland Raiders, the drunken sailors of pro football spending), and then had to be convinced not to retire. Yes, THAT’S a man I want to take in the first third of a draft.

Round 8, and I need a tight end, since you can’t toss a wideout in to that spot on a lark, like I can in every other FF league I’m a part of. I kinda wanted Chris Cooley of Washington, but also didn’t want to end up taking 3 guys from one team in the first 8 rounds. I’m relieved when he’s taken before I’m up, relieving me of the decision. I’m quite happy to take a bit of a sleeper…Denver’s Tony Scheffler. The kid was still figuring out his role last year, and still hauled in 49 passes, and I think he could really blow up this year, especially with their question marks out wide. The first defensive player goes next, Minnesota defensive end Jared Allen, catching me a little off guard. This is the second draft I’ve ever been in with defensive players, and the first ended 8 minutes before this one started. I didn’t figure on any D-man going this early. 2 more quickly follow, as do 2 more tight ends, proving I was probably right to grab mine when I did.

Round 9 and…dammit, there goes Arizona linebacker Karlos Dansby! I was hoping people would pass him over for a bit! I still want more depth, so I take Tennessee running back LenDale White. I honestly think part of the reason is that it will sicken Liam (though I will point out that it’s Round 9, and White is the 30th running back selected, and about the only guy left with any track record at all). 2 picks after me goes Jets linebacker David Harris, another guy I wanted to see fall. Crap!

Round 10…now that defensive players are going, we truly witness the retardity level of the autodraft system. It starts taking defensive backs…I have no idea what possible criteria are behind it’s choices, because it’s first pick is Will Blackmon. He’s a cornerback for Green Bay. He is the #4 cornerback for Green Bay. He plays a little bit more often than the towel boy. Anyway, CRAP! Green Bay’s Nick Barnett just went, ANOTHER linebacker I wanted, and the guy I was going to take in 2 friggin’ picks! AAGH! Oh well, I ’settle’ for Seattle’s Lofa Tatupu, a tackle machine who also gets a lot of picks. I’d love to see Houston’s DeMeco Ryans fall to the next round, so, of course, it doesn’t happen. Another wonderful autodraft selection occurs with Willie Andrews. He’s a DB in New England. His entire stats total over 2 years in the league…24 tackles. He’s lower on the depth chart than the owner.

Round 11….what the Hell?! Carolina wideout DJ Hackett just got taken, ANOTHER guy I wanted to see fall a bit. On the one hand, other guys are taking sleeper players WAY too early if a guy like Hackett gets his name called this early. On the other hand, it screws up my plans, because I was thinking another 2 rounds, and he’s mine. A defender named Travis Williams is autodrafted…I have to look him up, because I have no idea who this guy is. He’s a second year linebacker for Atlanta. He’s a scrub backup. He outweighs me by 8 pounds or so. Yeah, this dude’s a stud. I decide I want a premier D-back, so I take another Seattle player, cornerback Marcus Trufant. He gets picks, and he’s that rare corner that plays aggressively enough to load up on tackles, too.

Round 12…Denver linebacker DJ Williams. He’s a tackle machine, and in the past he’s gotten decent numbers in other areas, as well. He’s a good pick here. Very happy to get him. D’oh! The other Houston guy I was hoping to get, defensive end Mario Williams, is finally taken, at the end of the round. Not surprised…actually quite shocked he was still there at that point!

Round 13…another autodraft gem (there have been many the past few rounds, but this one is exceptional) in cornerback Allen Rossum. He’s basically just an average punt returner…and so far as I’m aware, he’s also unemployed. What a get! I decide to go with San Diego receiver Vincent Jackson. The wideout cupboard is getting bare, and I need a week one fill in. I like Jackson, and think he could have a decent season. We’re now at the halfway point, and I like the team.

Round 14…Pittsburgh linebacker James Harrison. He’s a good pass rusher, and he plays the run well, so a good number of sacks and of tackles should be in the offing here. Disappointed to see Rams safety Oshiomogho Atogwe taken by another. Not only is he a pretty good player, that is a flat out awesome name…he’s also Canadian! Round 15…I like me some of Jets safety Kerry Rhodes. He’s a nice player, in that he gets sacks, he gets fumbles forced/recovered, he gets picks, he gets deflections, and lord does he get tackles! Had he not gone 2 picks before I was up, Pittsburgh’s Troy Polamalu would have been my call, but Rhodes is not exactly a booby prize.

Round 16 features two of the most mindblowingly stupid selections I have ever seen. With the third choice of this round, a human player, NOT an autodrafter, selects…Kansas City defensive tackle James Reed. Defensive tackles do not put up the numbers to be picked. Reed doesn’t put up numbers at all…he ties up blockers and lets the other guys get the glory. He would have been a shitty 25th round pick. He’s an indescribably bad and bewildering pick here. I’m starting to wonder if I was supposed to receive a complimentary speedball to enjoy prior to draft time, as many of my fellow owners seem to have done so. Not to be outdone, though, Autodraft saddles some poor bastard with Jacksonville defensive tackle Tony McDaniel, a backup’s backup. Truly an award winning performance of excellence in the field of pure suckage. In a way, I respect the Autodraft’s unstoppable drive to the bottom of the barrel. My pick this round…Arizona linebacker Gerald Hayes. He ain’t flashy, but he’s consistent at racking up tackles.

Round 17, and it’s a chance to take a guy I actually like, from my team (Jacksonville) in safety Reggie Nelson. He had a good rookie season, and his potential is fantastic. At worst, he should replicate last year…57 solo stops, a bunch of assist tackles, and 5 picks. Autodraft keeps making me look things up, as it chooses something called a ‘Torrance Daniels’. Apparently he’s a third year backup linebacker. Round 18, and somebody didn’t pay attention to the fact that Cincinnati just released running back Rudi Johnson, because there he goes. Nice. I’m sure there will be a HUGE waiver market for broken down, worn out power runners. I need a backup quarterback. I feel solid enough everywhere else that it’s time to look. Look who I see…world class douchebag Philip Rivers! I simply cannot resist. Even his PHOTO screams “Hey, I’m the type of jagoff who would wave my dick in the face of a nun!”

Seriously, don’t you really just want to punch him square in the face? I do…Hell, a portion of his real life teammates do! At the very least, he gives me a good punching bag for abuse when things aren’t going well. He also is good enough that he could provide solid trade bait down the road.

Round 19…running back is so thin that Deuce McAllister was just taken. He’s coming off his 57th knee surgery. He’s a fond memory for me, in that the week before he blew his knee last year, I traded him to someone else. The bad part…I got Laurence Maroney in return. A blown knee ligament can only have helped HIS production last year (I do seem to recall him missing some games last year, I believe for a ‘pulled vagina’). Anyway, seeing as how things are getting desperate at running back, it’s time to take sleeper Chris Perry, who is now the starter in Cincy…and…AAAAUUUGHHH! There he fucking goes! DAMMIT! I take Oakland’s Justin Fargas, instead. The good news, he has been named the starter, despite the presence of overhyped rookie Darren McFadden. The bad news, prior to last year he was probably best known for looking pretty whilst standing injured on the sidelines. However, he’s my 5th running back…I’m not exactly superconcerned. I am pissed about missing Perry, though, who’s a risk, but has SERIOUS potential to blow up.

Round 20…situation also thin at wideout. Drew Bennett of the St. Louis Rams is my call. Is he great? No. He is a starter, though, and he’s about the 63rd or so WR to be taken, so I’m cool with it. Round 21…another defensive back, Washington safety LaRon Landry. Had a decent first year, playing out of position…now he’s at free safety, and  should really play well. Round 22…it’s kicker time! Several are already gone, but I’m not too sad to end up with Pittsburgh’s Jeff Reed. Somebody just took a running back named Tim Hightower. He’s Arizona’s third stringer. Yeah. Also, someone took Chicago safety Mike Brown. In the last 3 years, Brown has played a grand total of 19 games. In the last 2 years, 7 games. He’s more decrepit than the Samuel L Jackson character in Unbreakable.

23rd Round…we are truly down to the dregs, now. There is so little talent on offense, I elect to take a couple extra defenders. First up, Cincinnati cornerback Leon Hall. He had a very nice rookie year, and is another corner who gets a lot of tackles as well as a lot of picks. In the 24th, it’s Buffalo linebacker Paul Posluszny. At last, ONE of my goddamn sleepers actually lasted long enough for me to take him! The other one I had on D, Arizona safety Adrian Wilson, went several rounds ago. He’s a fantastic player, but he got hurt last year, so his numbers were down, and I’d hoped everyone else had forgotten about him (happened in my first draft today, where he was my second from last pick). Anyway, Paul’s rookie year was cut way short by injury, but he’s very good, and he has good DTs in front of him to tie up blocking. And in the last round…what a surprise, the kid I was hanging out for, Denver wideout Eddie Royal ( a rookie who was recently announced as the starter opposite Marshall) is taken! Oh well, I take the other rookie I like, Buffalo’s James Hardy. He’s tall enough to play pro hoops on a team with midget wideouts, which means he should catch a few TD passes when they’re close to the end zone.

And that’s it! Overall, I’m happy with the team. I’m a thousand times better than I was last year at running back, though my receiving corps probably isn’t quite as good. QB looks like a wash. Just to lay it out one more time….

QB - Ben Roethlisberger (3), Philip Rivers (18).

RB - Steven Jackson (1), Clinton Portis (2), Jonathan Stewart (6), LenDale White (9), Justin Fargas (19).

WR - Anquan Boldin (4), Brandon Marshall (5), Santana Moss (7), Vincent Jackson (13), Drew Bennett (20), James Hardy (25).

TE - Tony Scheffler (8).

K - Jeff Reed (22).

DL - Lofa Tatupu (10), DJ Williams (12), James Harrison (14), Gerald Hayes (16), Paul Posluszny (24).

DB - Marcus Trufant (11), Kerry Rhodes (15), Reggie Nelson (17), LaRon Landry (21), Leon Hall (23).

So the wedding is done. Everything went well. I have to say being in a catholic service which is all in Polish was quite interesting. I basically had to watch when people got up, sat down, knelt, got up, sat, etc... Possibly the weirdest thing i've ever been through!

I'll post pictures when I get home next week

Its been awhile since I posted and its been hectic a bit while in Poland. However the day is finally here where Rafal and Kinga will be married at 5pm Polish time. Right now its 12:30 here and the countdown is on. By the time most of you read this entry they will be married as you are all sleeping.

Its been quite an adventure here the past few days but everything has come together. I'm not really looking forward to returing to Canada next week but it can't last forever.

So, the Olympic games finished up a few days ago. I dunno, my interest level in them pretty much could be described as ‘nonexistent’. And I think a lot of that has to do with my complete and total lack of regard for the governing body of the Games, the IOC (cue Imperial March).

This is an organization built on corruption, and the awarding of the Games to the highest bidder, not only in terms of ‘mysterious deposits’ ion to the personal bank accounts of IOC officials, but also in to Olympic spending, which has reached ridiculously epic proportions. For fuck’s sake, the previous head of the IOC, Juan Antonio Samaranch, actually INSISTED on being referred to as ‘Excellency’. I actually kinda have to give such an egotistical douche a bit of a tip of the cap for apparently being anointed with 25 pound testicles, especially since such an affliction most likely makes the acquisition of pants a bit of a laborious process. Oh, and HOW did he become head of the IOC? Well, his impeccable credentials included a long stint as Sports Minister under Generalissimo Franco of Spain. You know, the dictator whose attempted coup d’etat in the mid 30’s led to the Spanish Civil War. The guy who, during that war, was heavily backed by the Nazis (really, anytime your main backer is THE NAZIS, you’ve pretty much lost when it comes to people looking back. I don’t care who you are…

 

“Boy, he liberated his people from tyranny, helped feed and clothe the poor, and built a kitten sanctuary.”

“He also got funding from the Nazis.”

“Huh. Let’s dig his corpse up just to crap on it, then light it on fire.”

By the way, Franco did NONE of these things, in case you were wondering. Nope, his resume would include terrorist campaigns against the Spanish populace, designed to discredit the government, suppression of about…let’s go with 973,000…different groups, crushing of anyone speaking out against him…you know, pretty much the Dictator Special (with a side of fries). And there was Juan, soaking in the limelight…and also in the blood of anyone arrayed against him (under his watch, the sports federation wasn’t exactly friendly towards ‘underperforming’ athletes).

Now, we have Jacques Rogge. Obviously, he’s French, so there’s Strike One. He also seems to have built his career completely as a mewling, cocksucking supplicant to anyone with power…so, in other words, being French. Also, being an arrogant dick, while accomplishing nothing beyond being a pathetic yes man…again, being French (this stuff practically writes itself! Hmmm…I need some sort of a ‘rimshot’ sound’ plugin for this blog). Seriously, the guy doesn’t really seem to have ever DONE anything related to athletics. Well, perhaps he surrendered at some point (simply irresistible), but aside from that, no.

He’s also a pathetic, hypocritical, spineless little cunt. This is the guy who claimed, in giving the 2008 games to China, that somehow the Olympics would magically transform that country from a brutal dictatorship in to a regime that treated its’ people with dignity and respect. Apparently, the gleam from the 5 Rings would cause the Chinese leaders to see the light of their errors, and become warm, fuzzy, teddy bear-like people, issuing hugs and money instead of tanks and jackboots. However, when this SOMEHOW did NOT come to pass (shocking EVERYONE, I’m sure!), and people began complaining that the games never should have been awarded to a dictatorial regime in the first place, now out comes Jacques, whining that the Olympics should not be seen as a political event whatsoever, and is just about sports and competition, a claim that would actually have made perfect sense, minus his early babblings about the IOC apparently being some fucking agent of change in the world.

The truth is, while the IOC was parroting the ridiculous lie about the awarding the the Olympics to China being the start of a sweeping change in that country (This strikes me as Rogge apparently seeing himself as Mickey Mouse in Fantasia, deciding his magic will clean out the whole country! Unfortunately, Jacques apparently only watched the first half of that movie, before the floodings and the marching of the army of militant brooms appeared.), they NEEDED to give the games to a brutal government that doesn’t give 2 shits about anything but its’ power, and will crush any vocal complaint. Why? Money.

See, the other major issue I have with these stupid things is the cost to the host country. The idea that being awarded the Games is a prize is ludicrous, when one looks at the financial state many countries have put themselves in to ‘earn’ it, building venues that will fall apart afterwards, since they aren’t used once competition is over, improving transport grids beyond what that area’s population actually needs once the legions of athletes and fans have gone, and beefing up infrastructure to a level unsupportable by the regular permanent and tourism populations. So, Olympic committees lie through their goddamn teeth. Every bid is laughable lowballed. Hell, the funding requests by the Vancouver committee have ALREADY more than doubled beyond their initial price claims. And, see, in a free country, people are actually informed that massive increases of tax money, of THEIR money, are needed…and they can complain about it. So, free countries have started actually spending LESS on these asinine spectacles.

Not China, though. Their government can spend like drunken retards with a sack of cash, and they did. They spend insane quantities of currency on the spectacle, and anyone who did complain was rounded up at gunpoint, roughed up, and tossed in to a ‘Happy Camp’. And the IOC NEEDED that…they needed a country that would throw scads of moolah at the Games, that would truly make them AN EVENT again, so they signed China up as quick as their greedy little fucking fingers could locate a pen. Now, they got their spectacle, and they hope that maybe, just maybe, future Olympic committees can stoke some insane bullshit rhetoric about national pride to convince enough idiots in their own populaces that maybe they SHOULD drop an extra billion in to the bottomless pit of Olympic spending. After all, we can’t let those lousy yellow COMMIES beat us, can we? They’re pure evil! Surely our stout, democratic, white hearts cannot allow the world to see us as weak next to the menace of China! It’s not just defense contractors that NEED China to become a rival in a new cold war…the Olympic movement needs it just as badly. They need a return to the ‘good old days’, when the Soviet Bloc and the West would toss roll after roll of cash in to their athletic programs, and in to Olympic bids, and on Games spending, desperate to show that they were ‘better’ than the other side.

The thing that makes me sad? It actually might work. Enough people might ignore the insane hypocrisy of a group that chastises 21 year old Usain Bolt for having the GALL to CELEBRATE a world record while it ignores the fact that the host country has a proven track record of running a national doping program. Might ignore the fact that they drop the hammer on athletes caught doping who don’t have national Olympic movements powerful/wealthy enough to make those tests ‘go away’, while those WITH the money and power, or the athlete who is a star, escapes one positive test after another, until they’re washed up, or the evidence reaches such a level of scream that even the IOC and WADA (their little lapdog of a drug testing organization) can’t ignore the outcry any longer (A great example of this…1988, Ben Johnson is stripped of his Gold. The 2-3-4 runners all move up a rank. Dennis Mitchell, the new Bronze winner, tested positive that Games, it was ignored. It wasn’t until a LATER track event that was NOT in the Olympics that his doping record was exposed when he tested positive THERE. New Silver medalist Linford Christie, who ALWAYS had that ‘Body by Dynabol’ look about him, popped positive a few years later and was banned. Carl Lewis, the new Gold medalist, was nailed for testosterone abuse years later. There is so much evidence, and so many testimonials by others, that Christie and Lewis were dopers their entire careers that you really can’t dismiss it.). Might ignore the fact that they speak out of both sides of their mouths on every issue, whilst keeping those dollars flowing in. Might ignore the fact that they slam down on anyone who would DARE to speak up about China’s fomenting of the violence in Darfur, and their oppression of Tibet, while ignoring the words and actions of the host country as they brutally crack down on Tibetan monks and unarmed protestors in the lead up to the games themselves.

I’d love to be able to believe that people will see past the medals and the ‘glory’ and see the truth about this bullshit, but people have always been easily distracted by things that are shiny. Too bad.

Identity Crisis

[Thanks to Lionel for introducing this one to me]
Written by Brad Meltzer, penciled by Rags Morales, inked by Michael Bair. ISBN-13: 978-1401204587.
Note: Amazon.com's "search inside" feature lets you read the first few pages.

"Anyone who puts a mask on paints a bulls-eye on their families backs."

The secret identities of super heroes is threatened: Someone knows all the secrets.  Someone is killing family members.  More than a murder mystery, it’s a view into the same world of costumed adventurers we all know, but there is something unique, and different, in this telling.  Meltzer surprises you with moments and nuances that fit these characters in ways you never dreamt.  This volume is unique.  You can’t think of the Justice League the same after this.  A complex adult telling of gripping story.

The fight against Deathstroke stands out as a crown jewel.  Deathstroke has spent a lot of time preparing for a fight, and it plays out more like a chessmatch than brawl, bringing fresh air into the treatment.  Its first rate intellectually stimulating stuff! 

You owe it to yourself to check out this book, a common reaction is "Was that really a comic book? Can a book be that good?"  You will re-think your definition of super-hero comics after reading this.

The Walking Dead

[Thanks to Shane for introducing this one to me]
Written by Robert Kirkman, art by Tony Moore, then Charlie Adlard.  Eight volumes so far, more to come.

What happens to the characters after the zombie film ends.  In a world overrun by flesh devouring fiends, how will the few remaining humans rebuild?  Or will they? 

We follow a sheriff, first in his search for his wife and son.  As time goes on, we will come to know the small group that grows around him.  This ongoing series explores how a society might rebuild, and rethink, itself after being torn down to its lowest levels.

Oh, but there are flesh sucking zombies at every turn, don't be doubting that.  Before long, however, it becomes clear that human beings are their own worst enemy. In oh so subtle increments, they are failing to hold things together. 

Tom Strong

Created by Alan Moore and Chris Sprouse. Collected in six volumes.

A tribute, parody, pastiche, homage and a damn good read.  Has an exciting pulse so often missing and missed in today's comics.  The medium is in such a hurry to be grown up and taken seriously.  This is the joy remembered from youth, but still accessible to our older selves. 

The boldly drawn lines of Tom Strong define our science hero as a beacon of strength.  He's lived for 100 years, chewing goloka root from his native island birthplace prolongs life.  He's got a robot butler that bickers with his talking Gorilla (Tom Strong performed surgery that increased the Gorilla's intelligence). His wife: A beautiful nubian princess.  Daughter's hot too.  Danger! Classic Villains! Alternate Dimensions! These are thrilling tales that conquer the imagination.

There's so much packed into Tom Strong.  It generates it's own fun, but also knows where its roots lie.  There's some fun to be had when some stories are told in an deliberately older style.  All in all: good times.

Alan Moore adds much depth to these pages; he clearly loves comics.  Moore is the king of comicdom, consider reading his Watchmen (soon a film) or The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen.  This dude rocks the comic writing shit.  He worships a snake, practiced polygamy and is a most beloved and cranky-ass recluse. Check out his damn crazy beard. Wow.

So, this weekend shall be the weekend of football drafts. On Saturday, the ‘other’ Matrix league has its’ draft. This will require me actually being up and at the computer at 9 o’clock in the goddamn morning, a prospect that does not thrill me in the least. However, it DOES answer the question of what would actually compel me to get up early on a weekend. Football geekery. Actually, is that even surprising?

The league which shall be taking up blog space as the weeks go on drafts on Sunday at the more humane time of 11 in the morning. (And, actually, I have a SECOND draft that day at 1 in the afternoon. This is for yet another league I joined up with before Matrix decided to set up theirs this year. That makes 5 FF teams I’ll have. Even I think that’s, frankly, a little sick).

Now, part of setting up for a draft involves setting your pre-draft player rankings. Sure, Yahoo has them set up already, but, much like with those of ESPN, they were apparently thrown together by people who have never actually seen a football, much less an actual game. I personally suspect that the cadre responsible here may have been the unborn child of James and Janine, a random tinfoil hat-wearing conspiracy theorist, and Osama Bin Laden, trying to ‘win’ the terror war through manipulation of fantasy sports. Anyway, yeah, they suck. They’re also pretty general, so they are in no way set up for whatever the scoring rules are for your league, if your league has any balls and differs from the norm.

So, I have just finished ranking the top 111 guys. Don’t ask me how it ended up at that number, that’s just where I stopped. Yahoo’s software SUCKS in comparison to ESPN’s…Jesus, that was a sweet setup they have over there, with multiple windows brimming with information. Here, you get…a list. You can put names on it. You can’t even rank by position, just the overall, which is not only silly, it’s also limiting. However, I am NOT a fantasy geek to the point I wish to download and install fantasy software. Yes, it exists. You can even run multiple ‘practice’ drafts against AI teams. See how far down this rabbithole really goes? If Morpheus had been handing out pills to head down this trip, little Neo would have shit his pants and run the other way. (Actually, I have to admit that, post draft, I might install some FF tracker stuff, though. Once you get everyone’s roster entered in to it, it keeps score for you, which means less math, which pleases me greatly. Although, I kinda liked the tension, in a sick way, as I was sitting there coming up with rough estimates…hmmm…I’ll have to consider this one.)

So, I’m not going to throw down the entire list, since that would really be stupid. I’ll list my…oh, I’ll go top 10. I’ve ranked no kickers or defenses, since that would be really, really stupid. I wonder how many dimwits won’t show up for the draft, and let the ‘Autodraft’ feature do it for them, and also won’t customize the rankings? I fondly remember THAT last year…the Chicago defense in round three, a kicker in the 8th or 9th….aaah, yes.

1. LaDainion Tomlinson - I think the last time LT DIDN’T head up a draft list might have been the year he was born. He does everything. Also, he seems to hate his arrogant twat of a quarterback as much as I do, and sharing a hatred is a quick way in to the good books with Cliff! (Bonus awesomeness…when I spellchecked this entry, it wanted to change LaDainion Tomlinson to Latino Collision. That might be the best thing ever. It will also be LT’s nickname from hence forth).

2. Brian Westbrook - This league gives 3 points PER CATCH. That makes him a MASSIVE scoring threat, when you also consider his usual 1200-1300 rushing yards. And I love tiny running backs.

3. Joseph Addai - See above. Uhhh…geez, what the Hell can you say about Addai? Uhhhh…he’s just kinda there…which works on an offense like the one the Colts have.

4. Steven Jackson - See above, but make the rushing numbers more in the 1400-1500 range…IF he and his line stay healthy. And you gotta have a guy with dreads on your roster!

5. Tom Brady - If this were a ‘Bangin’ Hot Chicks’ draft, Tom would score so highly, he’d somehow end up above number one, and be drafted .16.

6. Adrian Peterson - In a league that rewards receiving stats heavily, a guy who caught 19 balls last year really drops. I also don’t like the fact that, for every week last year he had 150 yards and 2 TDs on the ground, there was another week he had 37 yards and 2 fumbles. Frankly, I think he’s a massively overrated player in real life, too, as most commentators discuss him so reverentially, I keep waiting for him to turn the Gatorade in to a merlot.

7. Clinton Portis - Put up better numbers than I remembered as a tiny back in a power offense. Now he’s back in a speed/spread offense. And, hey, who doesn’t want a guy who just doesn’t see what the big deal about dogfighting is on their team?

8. Randy Moss - Not gonna do what he did last year, but is still the top receiver. I actually can’t think of anything funny to say about Randy…hmmm…that might drop him a couple spots.

9. Marion Barber III- Doesn’t get a ton of catches, but scores a lot of TDs. He also has the nifty ‘the 3rd’ thing going on with his name, which offers potential material for ranting/praising in blog posts.

10 Peyton Manning - If this draft awarded draft placement based on the similarities between the craniums of the player and Frankenstein’s monster, Peyton comes in .03. Seriously, this guy is downright Cro-Magnon looking. He’s also somewhat of a douchebag, and if you’re gonna have a team, you GOTTA have a douchebag heading it up!

So, there ya have it. Oh, I have absolutely no idea where I draft…that gets decided randomly a half hour beforehand. Kind of annoying, but what can ya do? Well…sure, I SUPPOSE you COULD go kill and old lady and steal her shoes, but how would that help???

We arrived in Poland a few days ago and have been enjoying it a lot so far. My first taste of Eastern Europe has been awesome so far. Very laid back here and the atmosphere is a lot better then I thought it would be. Everything here in Krakow is relaxing for the most part. No huge lines where everyone is pushing to get ahead no matter if you got a seat or not, and the places just let you relax and sit and sip your coffee (which is amazing here), or drink. No rushing like back home.

Rafal and Kinga are going to be married in 1 week and they are finally getting excited. They got most of the major stuff finally sorted out. Looking forward to it.

So that's about it for now. Just enjoying the food, and enjoying or looking forward to cooking meals in the apartment we rented!

I've been following the Olympics a bit here in Greece as all the Tavernas have them playing when we go and eat and sometimes before bed I'll turn it on. I've not heard or seen any Canadians in the
standings. I think I saw on the main home page for the Olympics we have something like 12 medals? Are you f*ing kidding me???

However I am not overly surprised. If you want to be an athlete the government only pays you like 800 dollars a month to live. How can anyone live off that with the cost of everything going up. If Canada wants to do better maybe they should take note of the Chinese and other countries where their athletes practice all year every year until the next Olympics. That's their job! So yeah again I'm NOT surprised by our dismal showing at this years Olympics. However summer never is our best time, we tend to do marginally better at the Winter Olympics.